How Connecting with Ancestors Can Help Heal Intergenerational Trauma
Trauma comes in many forms and is often a result of family lineage, which is why acknowledging the role of your ancestors can pave a path for healing
Many people think of trauma solely as an incident that happened to us or someone else that is intense, violent, or life-threatening; however, trauma can also be a suffering from emotional or psychological pain that results in stressful feelings.
Healing Intergenerational Trauma
Just as trauma can be intergenerational, so can healing. A literature review by Buonagurio [1] (2020) showed that dance/movement therapy can help individuals heal from intergenerational trauma or trauma that gets passed from one generation to the next. In this case, the body embodies the trauma and movement allows the individual to weave their narrative back together to acknowledge the inherited trauma, while at the same time promoting a sense of healing.
As Brown says, “your family’s past is not your destiny” (2022). Connecting with our ancestors not only sheds light on the past, it can also provide clues to who we are and how we can heal from intergenerational trauma. The fact is, because our ancestors’ destiny is not ours, we do have the power to heal and initiate change in our lives and future generations. [2]
In Ancestral Medicine: Rituals for Personal and Family Healing [3], Dr. Daniel Foor (2017) states that relating with your ancestors in a conscious way is beneficial for both psychological and physical health. In other words, it can boost confidence, make us aware of family predispositions and foster a sense of forgivingness which is an important aspect of familial healing. Those who are connected with their ancestors often feel more supported and comfortable in their skin; it encourages introspection, which can bring about clarity on our life purpose.
Losing Loved Ones and Visitations
By the time we arrive in our sixth decade, many of us have lost a number of loved ones. Some of those individuals might have been ancestors, including relatives and mentors, who have changed our lives in a meaningful way. It’s important to note that ancestors can also refer to places we’ve visited that deeply influenced us, and who may return in the form of a visitation.
During the Covid-19 pandemic lockdown, I found myself with a lot of time to ponder my ancestors and how they’ve influenced my life. I also spent many hours in my home writing studio waiting for the muse to arrive. Using keen observational skills, I was able to manifest the muse which inspired my most recent memoir, Hummingbird: Messages from My Ancestors, a Memoir with Reflection and Writing Prompts.
The journey of writing this book began with a daily hummingbird visit to the red flowers outside my writing studio window. It didn’t take long for me to believe that this beautiful visitor represented my maternal grandmother and caretaker, who died from suicide when I was 10.
My grandmother made herself known in a way that I cannot put into words. It’s important to note that she’s had a strong presence in my life since her passing nearly 60 years ago, because like me, she was also a writer and a healer. The pandemic hummingbird arrived at important moments, such as when I was dealing with personal or familial challenges. Sometimes when it visited, I asked it a question and heard my grandmother’s answer.
In addition to visits such as hummingbirds, there are other ways our ancestors come around. The important thing is that we pay attention to signs. Some people have found their ancestors appearing in the form of butterflies, wild animals, pictures, rainbows, slogans, coins, billboards, electrical interferences (such as flashing lights or cell phone), music, feathers, and certain numerical sequences.
Hummingbirds as Spiritual Guides
Intuitive individuals believe that hummingbirds are the greatest proof of messages from heaven. The birds can easily travel backward, which reminds us that it’s okay to look to our past and connect with memories of loved ones who have passed away. It’s been said that those who were close to you before they died commonly send messages in the form of bird spirit guides.
Hummingbirds, in particular, resonate at a high vibration, which makes them more connected to the spiritual realm. They’re also joyful reminders and tend to open our hearts and make us smile.
Hummingbirds are referred to as messengers from the heavens because they often show up when people grieve the loss of a loved one. In this way, they can also be healing. If you ever watch a hummingbird, you’ll notice that it can come to a complete stop when traveling at high speed. Also, their movements are often in the shape of an infinity sign; thus, their connection to eternity.
Some Native Americans believe the presence of hummingbirds brings unconditional love and harmony. The Aztecs, in particular, viewed hummingbirds as brave and courageous fighters. They also believed hummingbirds to be immortal, connecting us with our ancestors. Whenever one appears, it’s sometimes viewed as a visitation from an ancestor or a manifestation of a departed person’s spirit.
Ancestors Fostering Hope
Visits from ancestors can foster a renewed sense of hope and the ability to see life’s larger picture. Having hope is critical [4], especially when dealing with challenging times, tragedy, illness, the possibility of death, or even surviving a pandemic, while at the same time can help with understanding and coming to grips with intergenerational trauma.
While I’ve had some visitation from ancestors over the years, there was something very powerful about those lockdown hummingbird visits. I felt a renewed sense of perspective and the ability to see life’s larger picture. The hummingbird also had a calming effect on me, reminding me that everything will be okay.
In 2024, may you also be blessed with connecting to your ancestors during this year of the Dragon, which, according to Chinese culture, brings both luck and power.
Reflection / Writing Prompt:
- Describe any intergenerational healing that needs to occur in your family.
References
[1] Buonagurio, N. (2020). “The Cyle Continues: The Effects of Intergenerational Trauma on the Sense of Self and the Healing Opportunities of Dance/Movement Therapy: A Literature review. Expressive Therapies Capstone Theses.
[2] Brown, E. M. (2022, March 16). Intergenerational trauma and the promise of healing. Psychology Today.
[3] Foor, D. (2017). Ancestral medicine: Rituals for personal and family healing. Bear & Company.
[4] Raab, D. (2024). Hummingbird: Messages from My Ancestors, a memoir with reflection and writing prompts. Ann Arbor, MI: Modern History Press.
You may also enjoy reading Healing from Breaking the Cycle: Healing from Complex Trauma, by Laurie B. Timms