Journaling in China

I just returned from two spectacular but exhausting weeks in China, visiting Shanghai, Xian, Hangzou and Beijing. Traveling always inspires new perspectives and a multitude of journaling ideas and angles. If you were to ask what was my favorite part, I would simply say, the part that I was visiting at the time. Their world is so different than our world that I walked around each and every day in amazement. Particularly captivating was the long historical backdrop of the dynasties and the lives of the emperors and how much time was spent in making the emperor’s lives so superior during their lifetimes and in the afterlife. The palaces and mausoleums left me in awe, saying nothing about the number of concubines each emperor had. As someone who has been reading a great deal on Buddhism, I was also amazed by the gigantic temples and number of larger than life-size Buddhas. Here is a summary of the trips highlights:

Shanghai. At the airport I was glad to be greeted by a guide, because no signs were in English. There was a sense of culture shock in other ways also, such as not being able to access certain aspects of the internet from Google to social networking sites. In some areas, internet was either not possible or intermittent in a way that had little to do with remoteness, but more as a result of government control over services. This city has been considered the Paris of the east because of its women and sex clubs. In general, it was not as congested, polluted or dirty as I imagined. Many of the city’s sensibilities were a merging of east and west, the businesses and the fashion, for example. What I witnessed were the results of a massive growth spurt during the last 15 years. We visited the Shanghai Museum, an eclectic collection of relics, bowls, phenomenal Buddhas and more. We visited what was known as the Jewish Quarter or by western definition, the tenement quarters, where three or four families lived in an area smaller than my kitchen. I had heard about all the Jews who fled the Nazis to land here, but I had no idea about their enormous influence on the city’s growth. Philanthropist businessmen like Viktor Sassoon and the Kadoorie family who owned many of the city’s hotels, made their productive mark in so many parts of the city.

The Chinese people have sayings about everything – I could not write quickly enough. Some made immediate sense while others I needed to ponder. Here are only some which I quickly scribbled down while the guides interjected their wisdom into their historical discussions:

• the bird is a messenger to heaven
• the peach is a symbol of longevity and has nine lives. good to give as a gift
• bamboo is loved by the Chinese as they see it as meaning a long life. they should always be upright as this means there should always be something to learn
• Chinese coins are always round (symbolizes heaven) and square (symbolizes earth)
• Buddha was born under the gingko tree therefore it is considered a Buddhist plant
• Do not step on thresholds because they are thought to be the shoulders of Buddhas and should never be stepped upon.
• The Chinese (or people in general) believe in religion because it guides you and gives you parameters
• Laughing Buddhas hold a bag with troubles in their hand. They fill them up and forget them. I love this idea and will try to incorporate it in my life!
• In talking about relatives – they like when their family lives ‘soup distance,’ away, meaning that by the time you bring soup it will still be warm. Not many of us in the United States have this luxury, and certainly with all three of my kids on the east coast, I do not, but look forward to possibly one day being able to bring my homemade soup to them!
• The lotus is a symbol of purity and integrity.
• The Lily flower is used at weddings and signifies the couple will have a harmonious life for 100 years to come. Never use willows because if a woman is compared to a willow it means that she is flirtatious. However, if a woman is compared to a lotus, it means she is a natural beauty and does not need make up. Speaking of marriage– The Chinese say that the husband makes all the important decisions, but it’s the wife who decides what’s important!

Hangzhou. I loved this place. Our hotel was situated on beautiful West Lake. The first night we saw a water show of an unusual sort. There was a stage about three inches under the water, spanning the lake and the performers/dancers were dressed in traditional attire. They were like dancing fish performing a remarkable love story. Absolutely spectacular, with large boats and little row boats taking the lovers off into the sunset.

Hangzhou has been known as a honeymoon town and hometown of silk and tea. As a lover of green tea, I adored the private tour of the Mei family tea plantation and tea ceremony known for the best green tea in China, especially Dragon Well tea. (BTW, after buying boxes and bags of the stuff, I heard that we can get this tea, although a lesser quality, at Teavanna which is only minutes from my house!) This tea has three qualities, depending upon the season in which it was harvested. By the way, the water for a good cup of tea should not be brewed in a temperature more than 85 degrees. The hotter the water, the more bitter the leaves. The best time to drink is 30 minutes after meals as it aids in digestion. There is a big statue of Lu Yu (Literati) because he was considered the father of Chinese tea. He wrote the first book on Chinese Tea. I will never use tea bags again and I might have figured out why the Chinese women have such good figures.

We visited an herbal pharmacy that has been in business for centuries. I learned that herbal medicine consists of herbs, animal parts and mineral rocks.

Beijing. The great wall goes on and on. We were on the west side of the wall and took a cable car part of the way. The towers were built first and it’s amazing they even built a wall on this very mountainous terrain…there were a few times when I wondered about its real purpose! Visiting Tiananenmen Square and the mausoleum of Chairman Mao was a powerful way to end the trip. There were many visitors on this week day and we were told that many younger families bring their older relatives to remind them of the way things were. It was fascinating to see the history sweep across the faces of the seniors who vividly remember the perils of the Communist Regime. Our guide told us that two things the Chinese really value is their food and their freedom—and after visiting China, I can attest to this, even though I don’t think I will have another bowl of rice or marinated meat for a long time. We welcomed a big platter of French fries on our last evening out.

One last thing. When we asked the guide what American tourist attractions they associate with us, he said, Hollywood and Vegas! Now that’s a thought to ponder! No mention of the Empire State Building, The Statue of Liberty, Mount Rushmore, The White House or The Grand Canyon!

Thank You Cancer ….

Dear Readers

There is no cancer in my family, no cancer of any kind, except for mine. I am now 57 and it’s been 10 years since my diagnosis and I have never felt better.

Read more on my latest blog entry in honor of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, on The Huffington Post

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/red-room/breast-cancer-surgery-_b_967025.html

Here’s to your health ..

Namaste,
Diana

National Writing Day

Dear Readers:

I thought you might be interested in knowing that today is National Writing Day … so write away!

Here’s the link:

http://www.mediabistro.com/galleycat/national-day-on-writing-is-tomorrow_b40534

There are some neat writing exercises here.

This blog will be on hiatus to return Monday November 7th.

Cheers,
Diana

Writers and Their Dark Places

When I was ten years old my grandmother and caretaker committed suicide in her bedroom beside mine. It was Labor Day weekend and I knocked on her bedroom door to see if I could swim in a friend’s pool. With a child’s intuition, I knew something was seriously wrong and phoned my mother at work. Within minutes, an ambulance arrived at the front door. They took my grandmother away on a stretcher and I never saw her again. The emotions and visuals from that experience left me with an indelible wound which writing helped me heal.

It was the 1960s, a time when children were not typically welcome at funerals. Instead, my mother bought me a gold-embossed Khalil Gibran journal with sayings on the top of each page. She left me with a babysitter and told me to write down my feelings on the pages of my new journal.

To read more … check out my blog post in THE HUFFINGTON POST..

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/diana-m-raab/writers-and-their-dark-pl_b_994138.html


Have a good week !

Namaste,
Diana

Remembering Steve Jobs

Dear Readers:

Last week’s news about Steve Job’s passing left me speechless. It’s not that we were not all expecting it, but it just seems that sometimes we just get a sense that some people are immortal. He was one of those individuals. Jobs was a brilliant human being, innovator and visionary who will remain in our hearts and in our lives for a very long time. People often ask me how I am so efficient. In all honesty, I could not do all I do without Jobs–his creativity and innovations. His creations have made work fun. My MAC is like a friend … reliable and always there for me. My iPhone has become my confidant and I don’t go anywhere without it and if I do, I turn around and return home to retrieve it. It’s my connection with the world and with myself. Thank you Steve Jobs for everything. May you rest in peace…

I would like to share the wonderful words on the Apple Website:

Remembering Steve Jobs

Steve Jobs
1955-2011

Apple has lost a visionary and creative genius, and the world has lost an amazing human being. Those of us who have been fortunate enough to know and work with Steve have lost a dear friend and inspiring mentor. Steve leaves behind a company that only he could have built, and his spirit will forever be the foundation of Apple.

If you would like to share your thoughts, memories and condolences, please email rememberingsteve@apple.com

The Joy of Meditating

In keeping with my young adulthood passions, I have recently circled back to my young adulthood passion of group meditation in addition to my private practice at home every morning. Recently I have been attending the local Buddhist Center that practices Kadampa Buddhism founded by Geshe Kelsang Gyatso. This type of practice is dedicated to people everywhere to help us find meaning and purpose in our everyday lives. The goal is to develop a sense of peace and happiness. In this week’s discussion the Monk spoke about how the spiritual mind feels a larger goal in life and does not get caught up in the little things happening. He tends to focus on what he can do.
Often times when I talk about meditating, people tell me they want to do it but don’t know how to start. Of course, the answer is there are many different ways to meditate and you must find the right one for you. For example, some people like guided meditation to music while others prefer the quiet. It is really a wonderful way to start your day. Here are some basic guidelines for beginners:

- Find a quiet time and place
- Sit cross-legged on a cushion or a chair. It’s important that your back is straight.
- Rest your hands comfortably on your knees or lap, palms facing upward
- Close your eyes
- Focus on your breath. Nostril breathing is best.
- Do this for 10-15 minutes a day

The biggest challenge is fighting what Natalie Goldberg calls “the monkey mind.” Whenever your thoughts wander away from your breath, it’s important that you bring your attention back to your breath. Do not become obsessed or wrapped up in an idea or “to do list.” This is not the idea of meditation. It’s all about relaxation. Over time, you will notice a sense of calm and spacious feeling of the mind. You can also practice this exercise with your eyes open, waiting in line at the bank, supermarket or seated in a doctor’s office. Focusing on your breath can be enlightening. Try it!

Journaling (Non-Religious) Spirituality

Over the years I have oscillated back and forth on a spiritual continuum. After much contemplation I have come to the conclusion that I am a spiritual person but not a religious person. My spiritual journey began at the age of ten, when my mother gave me a red leather journal with Khalil Gibran sayings on the top of each page to help me cope with the then recent death of my grandmother. “Write down your feelings,” she told me, in an effort to help me through the loss. Gibran’s words of wisdom resonated with me at a deep level. His ideas also gave me something to grasp onto as I navigated through the pain and searched for reasons why she might have taken her life.

After my grandmother’s death, I also tried to find solace in traditional Passover rituals, but they just confused me. Not only did I not understand Hebrew, I didn’t even understand what the prayers meant in English and nothing was ever explained to me. As an only child of working immigrant parents I was taught to take things at face value and not look beyond.

During my early college years, I continued to search for meaning and signed up for an introductory course in transcendental meditation (TM) with Mahareshi Mahesh Yogi. The first meeting was held in an old two-story mansion. After being greeted by two young smiling women with ponytails and a sparkle in their eyes, we were escorted into the dining room where chairs were lined up in church-like fashion. When all of the seats were occupied, Maharishi gave an introduction into the practice of TM.

When the time came to raise my family, the question of religion surfaced once again. My husband and I decided to do what my father did and continued to be “Minimalist Jews,” meaning we would follow the holiday traditions, but remain unaffiliated. When our children began questioning, we chose to handle it differently than my own parents. We booted up our computers and bought some reference books and researched the meaning behind all the Jewish traditions. Fortunately, this information was much more accessible than during my own childhood where the only resource was typically the World Book Encyclopedia.

After my father passed away in 1991, we slowly abandoned many of the Jewish traditions and accentuated with our kids the simple importance of being honest, being a good person and practicing loving kindness. I also encouraged my children to meditate and take yoga classes.

In 2008 when the Dalai Lama visited my home town, I found myself passionately yanked into and moved by his words. Buddhist beliefs resonated with me at a deep level, perhaps because many are similar to those of the Jewish tradition instilled in me by my father. Others were simply common sense reminders of the importance of goodness. Here are only a few of his powerful tenets: be kind to others, whether your beliefs are similar or not; cultivate a habit of inner discipline; when our hearts are filled with love, there is no room for suspicion; one of the most beautiful aspects of being human is being able to smile; our attitude is critical for inner peace; negative thoughts and emotions obstruct our basic aspirations for happiness; and compassion belongs in every sphere of activity.

My spiritual journey has evolved from following mysterious rituals in childhood to seeing the clarity of Buddhist beliefs today. Losing my grandmother and the other sad moments in my life have made me appreciate the good times. I now welcome compassion and the fine art of living. Although Buddhism has many facets, the basic tenets of caring for and acting out of the concern for others, regardless of our religious traditions unites people, rather than dividing. This idea is so important during these tenuous and challenging times as we all search and struggle for some global meaning and sense of internal and external peace.

The Stress of Deadlines

The Stress of Deadlines

We all have deadlines. We love them and hate them. They force us to get things done but they stress us out. There is no escaping it. Whether you are a writer, artist, administrator, health care worker, educator, painter, physician, engineer, technician, mother, father or grandparent, life is full of deadlines.

According to a recent cover article, “Splintered By Stress,” in The Scientific American Mind (September/October 2011), “With the right training and preparation, we might be able to face any stressor with equanimity.” For starters, you can take their stress test to see how you can handle stress. The author, Robert Epstein did a study and found that prevention is the best way to cope with any type of stress. “It is empowering to learn how to do that,” he says.

So here are my ideas on how to handle deadline stresses:

• Review everything that you need to do. Seeing it laid out decreases the tension
• Focus on the now, rather than what you need to do
• Work backwards from your deadline. This will help you plan your next step of action
• Prioritize
• Formulate an early deadline, just in case of unexpected eventualities (you know, your cat gets run over, you lose your power, you run out of ice cream, etc.)
• Recite the Serenity Prayer:

G_d grant me the serenity
To accept the things
I cannot change..
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference ….

MOST IMPORTANT:
Remember that “stressed” spelled backwards is “desserts.” So why don’t you start meeting your deadline with a yummy dessert.

Laughter – The Best Medicine

During tenuous time, I believe in comic relief. The old adage “laughter being the best medicine,” is so right on.

This past Saturday, I attended an event given by Swami Beyondanada and sponsored by The Sacred Space in Summerland, California. I did not know what to expect other than being told that he was extremely funny. The event was sold out.

For those of you who have not heard of him, the Swami is an international author, humorist and workshop leader. He has been called irreverently uplifting and has been described as a comic disguised as wisdom and wisdom disguised as a comic. He started out by saying, “It’s great to be here and you know we have no choice because no matter where we are, we are always here and it’s always now.” The roars of laughter continued for the next 90 minutes that included a 40-minute question and answer period.

His real name is Steve Bhaerman and he believes in using laughter to enlighten up our lives and those in the lives around us. What can be more healing?

To see a you-tube of him, check out this short clip:

In summary, here are some of the very many benefits of laughter:

it’s a good antidote to stress
it strengthens the immune system
it increases energy
it decreases pain
it improves mood
it decreases anxiety
it enhances teamwork
it binds people
it’s contagious
it’s cheap

So lighten up and laugh – the benefits outweigh the risks (if there are any!) for sure!

Namaste,
Diana

Transpersonal Psychology with Stanislav Grof

This past week I attended my first seminar for my PhD in Transpersonal Psychology at the Institute of Transpersonal Psychology in Palo Alto, CA. The keynote speaker was Stanislav Grof, author of Psychology of the Future (SUNY Press, 2000). His book and discussion were illuminating. Dr. Grof is a psychiatrist with more than sixty years of experience in the field of non-ordinary states of consciousness, who conducted a great deal of research with hallucinogenics in the 1960s. I immediately connected with him; after all, I am a baby boomer who grew up in New York in the 1960s. You bet I did my own experimentation to bring me to altered states of consciousness, although it was never called that. It was simply referred to as “getting high.”

Grof’s premise involves the idea that hallucinogenics have the ability to help us transcend to places which assist us in understanding who we are and what we are here for. So much of what he said resonated with me and it was nice to hear how eloquently he articulates his ideas. His discussion reminded me of an incident in my own adolescence. When my beloved grandfather who lived with us suddenly collapsed from a heart attack I remember feeling deep sadness and being offered LSD by some friends. They said the drug would not necessarily remove my grief nor help me escape it, but rather, it would help me reconnect with my grandfather at a more profound level.

As an open-minded teenager, I accepted their offering and since that day forward have believed in the power of hallucinogens.
Back in the 1960s the discipline of transpersonal psychology was not yet formulated. So I sort of consider myself an early practitioner, with my experimentation with LSD and practice of transcendental meditation. In some ways, I feel like a pioneer amongst my peers! In view of this, one of the most interesting ideas that I came away with from Grof’s talk was the idea that the deepest force or motive behind alcoholism and other forms of addiction is the misguided craving for some sort of transcendence. I had not heard this theory before and not only does it make absolute sense, but it also gives credence to my own experimentation with hallucinogenics. It is a fascinating idea that those with a tendency toward various addictions are searching for transcendence or a way to bring their lives to another level, whether they choose to use illicit drugs, alcohol, sex, food, or gambling.

The seminar also reminded me that the world is one big family, and that no matter where we live, who we are or what are our spiritual or cultural orientations, there is a common thread running through our lives. This is the ultimate quest for happiness. Everything we do and say is motivated by this common quest. On that note, I would like to feel a smile from all my readers!