Archive for the 'inspiration' Category

Honoring Women’s History Month

Published on March 12, 2012 in Author Blog, inspiration, Journaling, Journals, Tristine Rainer and Writing, journaling.

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In honor of National Women’s History month, I would like to honor someone whose writing has changed my life. Her name is Anais Nin.

Anais Nin was many things to many people: friend, confidant, lover, author, philosopher, psychologist, and diarist. In many ways she was a Renaissance woman, interested and interesting in many areas. As a French-Cuban author, she was best known for her published journals that spanned 60 years. Like myself, a traumatic event turned her onto writing. When she was 11 years old, her father left the family for a younger woman. Her journals began as a letter to him and as time went on those pages became her best friend, confidant, and a crucial part of her everyday life. Here’s what she said about her diary: “[It] deals always with the immediate present, the warm, the near, being written at white heat develops a love of the living moment. One thing is very clear—that both diary and fiction tend toward the same goal: intimate contact with people, with experiences, with life itself.”

In addition to journals, she also dabbled in writing novels, shorts stories and erotic literature. For a times she also busied herself with psychotherapy, inspired by and working under Otto Rank, who had worked with Sigmund Freud.

What makes her work so appealing to women is that she provides profound insights into her own role as a woman, a sexual being and erotic spirit. This helps other women define themselves and understand who they have always wanted to become. Her written voice is powerful and compelling and the fictional female characters she created are quite strong. She was not a feminist, although I have heard that she was often invited to speak at feminist rallies and events.

My dear friend, Tristine Rainer, a powerful and accomplished woman in her own right (see her website– http://www.storyhelp.com/tristine.html” was Anais’ friend and protegee and their relationship left an indelible mark on Tristine. Often at lunch, Tristine will quote what Nin would have said or done in a given situation. Recently, I had asked Tristine to share the most important thing she learned from Nin, and she said “I learned that a crazy young woman in her twenties can become a joyful, wise woman in her sixties. It was her [Nin’s] belief that we can transform ourselves and our lives through self-creation. And that diary writing was a way.”

Some of my favorite thoughts from the writings of Anais Nin:

Life shrinks and expands in proportion to one’s courage.

We don’t see things as they are, we see them how we are.

Passion gives me moments of wholensss.

Group activities weaken our will. They may be a solace to loneliness, but they do not foster the individual creative will.

The role of a writer is not to say what we can all say, but what we are unable to say.

We write to taste life twice, in the moment, and in the retrospection… We write to be able to transcend our life, to reach beyond it. We write to teach ourselves to speak with others, to record the journey into the labyrinth.

There were always in me, two women at least,
one woman desperate and bewildered,
who felt she was drowning and another who
would leap into a scene, as upon a stage,
conceal her true emotions because they
were weakness, helplessness, despair,
and present to the world only a smile,
an eagerness, curiosity, enthusiasm, interest.

While an MFA student at Spalding University, I rediscovered Nin in the course of my research on diaries and their healing and cathartic benefits. Because a traumatic event triggered or set the platform for both of our writing careers, her story resonated with me. Furthermore, I admired the candor with which she wrote. Her words strongly embodied her deepest sentiments, so much so that the reader experiences similar feelings. When I wrote my first poetry book, I dedicated the book to her and called it, Dear Anais: My Life in Poems for You. My introduction which includes a letter to Nin, finishes like this: “You have taught me the intrinsic value of the written word, how to dig deeper into my emotional truth, and the importance of having love in my life. And for this I thank you.”

And thank you to all the women out there who have, through their good works, empowered the lives of other women. For more information on National Women’s History Month, check out this link:

http://womenshistorymonth.gov/


READERS: I would also love to hear which woman has inspired you in your own life and/or career…

Tribute to John Lennon — 31 years later …

Published on December 12, 2011 in Author Blog, Baby Boomers, inspiration, Journaling, Journals, writer blog and writing.

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(October 9, 1940 – December 8, 1980)

Last week celebrated the 31st anniversary of John Lennon’s death. As a hippie of the 1960s, who danced and made love to his music all day and night, my memories of his essence and songs will live with me forever. Like the rest of America, I remember seeing him first appear as part of the Beatles on the Ed Sullivan Show in 1965. There was something about the music, which resonated with everyone, and the proof is that The Beatles were one of the most successful commercial groups in the history of popular music. What is even more interesting is how the lyrics can continue to resonate in your head even this many years later. Lennon had an edge to him and perhaps it was his rebellious nature, politically, socially and musically which really resonated with many of us. Rolling Stone Magazine rated him the 5th greatest singer of all time. As what you might expect from a man with five sisters, he really understood women and his relationship with Yoko Ono is one, which many of us admired.

I just finished a few pages in my journal dedicated to Lennon and the powerful influence he had in my life. In addition to loving his music, I have another connection with Lennon. My last boyfriend, before getting married lived in the Dakota, and I know exactly where he got shot by Mark David Chapman. But that’s another story…
Check out this You-Tube of Lennon and one of my favorite songs of his: IMAGINE…

Here are the lyrics:

IMAGINE
Imagine there’s no heaven
It’s easy if you try
No hell below us
Above us only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today…
Imagine there’s no countries
It isn’t hard to do
Nothing to kill or die for
And no religion too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace…
You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will be as one
Imagine no possessions
I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger
A brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world…
You may say I’m a dreamer
But I’m not the only one
I hope someday you’ll join us
And the world will live as one

The Joy of Meditating

Published on October 3, 2011 in 1960s, Alternative Medicine, Author Blog, Geshe Kelsang Gyatso, inspiration, meditation, Musings and writer blog.

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In keeping with my young adulthood passions, I have recently circled back to my young adulthood passion of group meditation in addition to my private practice at home every morning. Recently I have been attending the local Buddhist Center that practices Kadampa Buddhism founded by Geshe Kelsang Gyatso. This type of practice is dedicated to people everywhere to help us find meaning and purpose in our everyday lives. The goal is to develop a sense of peace and happiness. In this week’s discussion the Monk spoke about how the spiritual mind feels a larger goal in life and does not get caught up in the little things happening. He tends to focus on what he can do.
Often times when I talk about meditating, people tell me they want to do it but don’t know how to start. Of course, the answer is there are many different ways to meditate and you must find the right one for you. For example, some people like guided meditation to music while others prefer the quiet. It is really a wonderful way to start your day. Here are some basic guidelines for beginners:

- Find a quiet time and place
- Sit cross-legged on a cushion or a chair. It’s important that your back is straight.
- Rest your hands comfortably on your knees or lap, palms facing upward
- Close your eyes
- Focus on your breath. Nostril breathing is best.
- Do this for 10-15 minutes a day

The biggest challenge is fighting what Natalie Goldberg calls “the monkey mind.” Whenever your thoughts wander away from your breath, it’s important that you bring your attention back to your breath. Do not become obsessed or wrapped up in an idea or “to do list.” This is not the idea of meditation. It’s all about relaxation. Over time, you will notice a sense of calm and spacious feeling of the mind. You can also practice this exercise with your eyes open, waiting in line at the bank, supermarket or seated in a doctor’s office. Focusing on your breath can be enlightening. Try it!

Typos and Misspellings

Published on August 8, 2011 in Author Blog, inspiration, Musings, New York Times and writer blog.

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A typo is a mistake in typesetting or in the typing process. It’s typically due to human error and does not necessarily include spelling errors. In this article, however, I am lumping typos and spelling errors together because, as writers, if we are not good spellers, chances are we will miss typos when rereading our work.

Typos drive me crazy. They really bother me. I do not care to dive into the psychology behind my frustration, and I’m sure I make my fair share, but I also make a point of reading my work a few times before sending it out. Even emails. I was delighted to read a discussion on this subject in a recent Op-ed piece in the New York Times, called, “The Price of Typos,” by Virginia Hefferson, particularly as it relates to the digital era.

As the compiler and editor of two anthologies, Writers and Their Notebooks, and Writers on the Edge: 22 Writers Speak on Addiction and Dependency (due out in 2012) I am intrigued by various writers’ spelling skills—or lack thereof. According to Hefferson, there is no pattern; Nabakov was a great speller and Fitzgerald was not. Instead of just saying some people are only talented one way or another, Hefferson analyzes the personality of the good and bad speller. She purports that bad spellers tend to see through the words he or she encounters, straight to the things, characters, ideas, images an emotions they conjure, thus they tend to be good at reportage. While good spellers tend to see language as a system and are more often than not, drawn to wordplay and genres like poetry. Since I am a poet who loves Scrabble and crossword puzzles and who is obsessed with the correct spelling of words, I was drawn to this concept.

For poor spellers, there are numerous web sites, which offer suggestions on how to improve one’s spelling. Most of the recommendations include doing more reading and writing, two things writers tend to do on a regular basis. First, if you are a journal keeper it is suggested that you find new ways to use old and new words; second, whenever you finish your writing whether in a journal, on a pad or on the computer, make sure to check for mistakes. It is hoped that as time passes, you should find fewer words to correct.

With the new flood of digital media, the increased amount of typos and spelling errors has become a large issue. “The reason for this seems two-fold: work is published more quickly with less attentiveness is paid towards editing and, when cutbacks in the publishing houses began happening, those who first lost their jobs were the copyeditors and proofreaders—those typically responsible for catching misspelled words and typos. It just seems as if publishers, small, medium and large have become less vigilant about editing and spelling. Rushing to publish and overlooking glaring typos may have become part of the new economics of traditional publishing,” concludes Hefferson.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

Published on June 13, 2011 in Anais Nin, cathartic writing, Creativity, Decisions, Heuristic, inspiration, Wray Herbert, writer blog and Writers and Their Notebooks.

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I often tell my students that if they are encountering turbulent times or having difficulty making a decision, whether it is large or small, they should use their journal to help figure out their answers. No doubt, some decisions are easier to make than others. Writing in your journal can help you make decisions by identifying the potential risks and gains of a situation. Journaling can help you come to grips with what is really going on. Writing empowers us.

In a recent article in U.S. News & World Report (special edition: Secrets of Your Brain) there was an excerpt from a new book called, One Second-Thought: Outsmarting Your Minds’ Hard-Wired Habits by Wray Herbert. The author discusses the concept of heuristics which refers to the experience-based techniques which help us make decisions. He discusses how over time humans have evolved these cognitive rules of thumb. Heuristics can help us efficiently navigate the many choices we are faced with every day. The author postulates that even though heuristics comes in handy, they are at times imperfect and irrational. Sometimes using heuristics can be a trap because we might become lazy and not think through certain decisions.

The author discusses the various types of heuristics, including: the familiarity heuristic, default heuristic and the acceptance heuristic. The familiarity heuristic is a result of habit and experience and it is almost automatic. The default heuristic refers to us having a powerful bias for sticking with a decision we have once made. In other words, we don’t want to rock the boat. It’s the safe, stay-the-course impulse which, in the past has provided good results. Constant switching back and forth about what to do, can be perilous, in regard to all decisions including financial and romantic. As a result we have become adverse to hopping around. The acceptance heuristic illustrates our overpowering tendency to make choices which others approve of. It’s about being safe and feeling a sense of belonging to society. This is connected to the idea of group dynamics.

Many studies have been done on the subject of decision-making. While some people have difficulty making decisions and are scared about the possibility of making the wrong decision, others find the task of making a decision quite easy.

My readings taught me that those with the following traits, tend to make easier and more efficient decisions:

1. good self-esteem
2. honesty with oneself
3. loving oneself
4. having courage

One of the best ways to make a personal decision is through self-talk and one of the best ways to do this is through the practice of regular journaling.

“Once you make a decision, says Emerson, “the universe conspires to make it happen.”

Journaling: A Message to All Graduating Students

Published on May 24, 2011 in Author Blog, Bill Clinton, Creativity, graduates, graduation, inspiration, Journaling, Journals, Musings, New York University and Writing, journaling.

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I just returned from New York where I attended my son’s graduation from NYU. It was a week of celebration and festivities with many highlights, one of which was having former President, Bill Clinton, as the keynote speaker for the 179th commencement ceremony at Yankee Stadium on Wednesday, May 18th. I had my journal in my pocket and scribbled down all of his wonderful words of wisdom.

In addition to receiving an honorary doctorate, he had many poignant messages for these students, about to march out into the ‘real world.’ In spite of all the issues facing the world today, he remained positive and offered the students tips on how to navigate the tough terrain. I give him kudos for being able to focus on the positive while addressing the bleak economic and world trends. He stressed the importance of accentuating the positive forces in the world while at the same time diminishing the negative. “We need to find a way to decrease the negative,” he reiterated.

He discussed humanity and equality and summarized that “the borders of the world look more like nets than walls.” He said, “today, 10-year olds can find out something on the internet I had to go to university to learn.”

He stressed the importance of having a passion and enjoying the type of work you choose. He succinctly stated, “Do what you love, work hard at it, and don’t quit….You should strive to find happiness every day and not believe that it comes at the end of the journey and most people are happiest doing what they are good at.” Furthermore, he said, “when pursuing your dreams, you can’t quit when you fail; you can’t quit when you mess up and when life seems to deal you a tough hand.”

He talked about their future and summarized: “You must decide what you want the world to look like when your children are sitting where you are today… believe that the only way to win the planet is to share it and the only way to do it is to think of our grandchildren.”

To hear the speech in its entirety, go to this link:

http://www.nyu.edu/life/events-traditions/commencement/web-cast.html

Congratulations to all graduates, worldwide!!
Diana

Performance Matters

Published on March 14, 2011 in Author Blog, inspiration, music, writer blog and writing.

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Since seeing Eric Clapton live last week in Los Angeles, I have been thinking a lot about the artistic persona. First and foremost, I must say that I really enjoyed this concert, watching this amazing legend who I have admired since my adolescence. It was a delight to observe his relationship with his guitar. Surely that was the point of the concert, but what is interesting is that he did not seem to have much of a relationship with the others on stage, nor his audience. In fact, he only introduced one of his piano players and no one else. He uttered only six words after each song – “thank you, thank you, thank you,” and that was the extent of his interaction with the audience. There were no introductions, anecdotes or words of wisdom. We were enthusiastic, but I think we would have been even more so, had he shared an anecdote or two along with his songs or portrayed some of his performance personality. But he did not, except through the lyrics of his wonderful songs.

During the concert I wondered about Clapton’s persona. Persona is the character that an artist conveys to their audience and Clapton’s character was flat. Was he burned out during what might be his last world tour, I wondered. Eventually, I came to the conclusion that either he was very depressed (after all he did lose his son a few years back) or he might not have much personality, something I vaguely remember from the 1960s when I saw him during his years with the Cream.

The evening inspired me to think about the importance of persona for a writer doing a public reading and how important this may be for a fan club and/or book sales. We all know that there is a huge difference between writing and reading. Being and a good writer does not make one a good public reader, nor visa versa. But do our readers care? Will they still like our work even if they attend our readings and do not like how we read?

For me the answer is yes. I will still buy Clapton’s music, however, I am a less of a fan now than I was prior to last week’s concert. We are now living in an era when it is not enough for even a writer to just write. We have to be out there exposing who we are. Whether it is done on You-tube or at a bookstore, readings are part of a writer’s professional job description. Some might argue, that, in some cases, a bad reading could be counterproductive.

So how does the performance-shy writer compensate? Well, fortunately it’s the 21st century and there are many alternatives such as joining social network sites to maintain contact with readers and journalists. With each inane tweet we dream of being an A-list author or New York Times bestselling author, but the social networking still feels like a necessary evil. Some writers may even employ someone else to read their work—perhaps an actor, but I wonder how this affects book sales. Don’t our readers want to see our persona, even if it is weak?

I welcome your thoughts on this subject.

The Magic of a Good Book

Published on January 24, 2011 in Anais Nin, Author Blog, Creativity, General Information, inspiration, Reading, The Catcher in the Rye, writer blog and writing.

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What makes a good book? What makes it hang around for so many years? Why is it that some books you are unable to put down? Many people have speculated on the answer to this question. Personally, I’m not so sure what makes a book timeless. Let us speculate together.

When you cannot put a book down, it might indicate that the author logically composed the book and that the book flows intuitively. The story and its characters are believable. A believable character is also one who wants something. In fact, the author might spend an entire book helping them character get what he or she wants. It has been said that an unmet desire is what makes a story move forward. In fact, when the protagonist gets what they want, the story is usually over.

I also believe that voice makes a good book. The voice is the individual writing style of a writer and what distinguishes one writer from the next. Voice refers to the tone and feeling of the writing, accomplished and this is done through word choice and sentence structure. It is the way an author’s writing sounds on the page, whether it be friendly, formal, chatty or distant. Every writer has a distinct voice and it is this plot which propel a story forward. Often the voice in memoir is easier to detect, because it’s written in the first person.

One of my favorite first-person booksis still as popular as it was at the time of its first release in 1951—Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger who died about one year ago at the age of ninety-one. Salinger used the repetition of certain words which helped to establish both voice and the character development of his protagonist, Holden Caulfield.

In summary, a good classic book teaches you a great deal about life, enriches your mind, provides you with a moral and reveals a passion worth investigating.

Here’s a partial list of some of my favorite books, in no particular order. Perhaps you can share some of yours:

Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
La Comedie Humaine by Honore Balzac
The Journals of Anaïs Nin
The Executioner’s Song by Norman Mailer
Ahab’s Wife by Sena Jeter Naslund
Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert
This Boy’s Life by Tobias Wolff
The Color of Water by James McBride
Blue Angel by Francine Prose
Angela’s Ashes by Frank McCourt
The Glass Castle by Jeannette Walls
Gift From the Sea by Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden
The Liar’s Club by Mary Karr
My Invented Country by Isabel Allende
Darkness Invisible by William Styron
Of Human Bondage by W. Somerset Maugham
Walden by Henry David Thoreau
A Separate Piece by John Knowles
The Awakening by Kate Chopin
My Antonia by Willa Cather
Siddhartha by Herman Hesse

The Mystery of Inspiration

Published on January 10, 2011 in Author Blog, inspiration, Journals, Musings, Passions, writer blog and writing.

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The January/February 2011 issue of Poets & Writers focuses on “Inspiration.” The issue is stacked with fabulous articles on the subject giving insight to the age-old question typically asked of writers and other creative individuals, whether at conferences, coffee shops or in airplanes: “Where do you get your story ideas from?”

Most writers will respond by saying that their ideas come to them from life, talking to people, observing and through reading, but in his article, “The Greatest Mystery: Where Writers Ideas Come From,” contributing writer, Kevin Nance digs even deeper into this subject.

We agree that inspiration cannot be confined or commanded and its nature is so unpredictable and random, it makes it much more difficult to analyze.

Many writers regard inspiration superstitiously: when they are inspired by an idea they will not share it with anyone until the work is written or sold, out of fear the idea might be stolen.

Typically, says Nance, ideas are triggered by the real world – “Sometimes by events that occurred in the distant past, as recorded in historical books and records.” Others might get ideas from their own personal lives, whether they are writing fiction, nonfiction or poetry.

Some writers get their inspiration while traveling. One of my favorite poets, Yusef Komunyakaa, says: “Strange hotel rooms at midnight in cities I would never have dreamt I’d see, as a boy from rural Louisiana, are, in such moments, places of revelation.”

For myself and other writers, such as poet David Rivard, sitting in public places like coffeeshops help to generate wonderful ideas. “There’s something about the slight distraction of being in a public place that really works to help generate ideas,” he says. Other writers, like Charles Baxter, get ideas while driving.

The trick, says Nance, is knowing which ideas are useful or worth pursuing. Oftentimes, he says, the new idea is the keyhole, the room that contains the poem, story, or novel, has already been under construction for some time. The idea has appeared as an emissary; the room is asking to be entered.

Writers like T.C. Boyle and Anne Rice are both fascinated by how so many of their ideas stem from obsessive concerns which oftentimes they might not be aware of during the writing process. There’s no doubt that these two, are obsessed by particular subjects which appear over and over again in their work. It seems there might be an upside to being obsessed, particularly if it generates powerful and wonderful work.

Ideas might do not necessarily reveal their potential right away, but only after a lapse or period of contemplation. In general, inspiration comes from having passion, whether its seen on the surface or more deeply-seated. Inspiration helps us feel alive, connected and energized and comes in many shapes and forms. Sometimes it is difficult to find inspiration, but the key is to use all of your senses as much as possible. In other words, keep your ears and eyes open.

So what inspires you, my valued reader?

The Fine Art of Storytelling

Published on December 20, 2010 in Author Blog, autobiographies, Creativity, General Information, inspiration, Journaling, Journals, Reading, writer blog and Writing, journaling.

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Lately I have found myself contemplating the fine art of storytelling. Some people are wonderful at it and others just want to make you yawn. The idea of storytelling is the conveying of events in words, images, sounds and embellishments. It is a way to express the emotional power of information. Robert McKee, in his book, Story, says “Stories are equipment for living.” In fact, when a story is told well, the listener is transported on a journey to a new place.

According to John Gardner, “Like other kinds of intelligence, the storyteller is partly natural, partly trained. It is composed of several qualities, most of which, in normal people, are signs of either immaturity or incivility: wit (a tendency to make irreverent connections); obstinacy and a tendency toward churlishness (a refusal to believe what all sensible people know is true); childishness (an apparent lack of mental focus and serious life purpose, a fondness for daydreaming and telling pointless lies, a lack of proper respect, mischievousness, an unseemly propensity for crying over nothing); a marked tendency toward oral or anal fixation or both (the oral manifested by excessive eating, drinking, smoking, and chattering; the anal by nervous cleanliness and neatness coupled with a weird fascination with dirty jokes); remarkable powers of eidetic recall, or visual memory (a usual feature of early adolescence and mental retardation); a strange admixture of shameless playfulness and embarrassing earnestness, the latter often heightened by irrationally intense feelings for or against religion; patience like a cat’s; a criminal streak of cunning; psychological instability; recklessness, impulsiveness, and improvidence; and finally, an inexplicable and incurable addiction to stories, written or oral, bad or good. Not all writers have exactly these same virtues, of course. Occasionally one finds one who is not abnormally improvident.”

The holiday season is a good time to share stories amongst friends and family. Some people are better at verbal storytelling, while others, like myself, prefer to revert to the written word. Many of our preferences and comfort zones reflect back to the patterns of our childhoods. As an only child of working parents, I spent a lot of time reading and writing in my journal. My parents were first generation immigrants and worked very long hours to provide food for our table. Dinners were often rushed with a minimum amount of storytelling unless we had a visitor who probed us. As a result, I was raised with books and paper, but gravitated to friends who were good storytellers because my situation made me a good listener. Things haven’t changed. I am who I am.

Lately, I’ve become good friends with a few great storytellers and I have been captivated, mesmerized and curious about what it is that’s missing for me to tell a good story. I have also done some reading to improve my own verbal storytelling (my family often tells me, I neglect to build up the tension and/or I omit the punch line). Heading into my sixth decade, I plan to improve this. Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

- Before telling your story, you need to know it well and/or memorize it
- Vary the pitch in your voice when telling a story
- Make sure your facial expressions coincide with the story’s mood
- Make sure the sequence of events is correct
- Build up to the story’s climax
- When finished do not go on to another story
- Practice storytelling in front of a mirror

One thing I also read was the importance of putting on a “story hat.” In other words, just before you are to tell a story, put on your story hat which gets you in the mood to tell your story. It is a way to take your mind off your audience, particularly if you are on the shy side.

If you are curious about some more tips in this area, I suggest you check out a great you-tube on the subject, called, “Storytelling: Theory and Practice.”

A Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to one and all!

This blog will be taking a two-week hiatus.

Namaste,
Diana